Perfect Pancakes

I love a good pancake, don't you?  But getting the pan at just the right temperature and flipped over at just the right time is an art.

Here.  Let me make it easier for you.

Multiply as needed for friends, family, and the week ahead.  (Good use for that ketchup bottle)

Ingredients:
1 cup flour
1 tablespoon sugar
1 pinch salt
1 pinch cinnamon (optional.  I also enjoy nutmeg, personally)
2 teaspoons baking POWDER (not soda.  Really.)
2 tablespoons applesauce or oil, if you really must be that way
1 egg
1 cup milk

Directions
 Mix all your dry ingredients thoroughly, especially the baking powder, which tends to cake together. Beat together the wet ingredients, then beat everything together until you've gotten all the lumps out.

Heat a good nonstick skillet on the stove over medium heat (this is for an electric range.  Gas ranges may want to go with more of a mid-low).  When you hold your hand over it (not touching) and it feels warm, pour in about 1/4 cup of batter. 

Watch the batter until air bubbles appear all over the top (especially towards the middle) like so

Using the widest spatula you have, press hard against the bottom of the pan and swipe straight under the pancake so you're holding the whole thing on the spatula.  Quickly flip that sucker over and into the pan.  (Ever try the game when you were a kid where you swung the bucket around over your head really fast to keep the water in there?  Same concept.)  Give it about a minute to a minute and a half on that side and then slide it off on your plate.  Repeat till you have the desired number of pancakes.

If you have any leftover batter, you can store it for about a week in a well covered container.  Old squeeze ketchup bottles are a marvel for this.

Pie Crust

Pie crust is one of the most loved or hated desert items I've ever come across.  People either devour it with the avid attention of the starving or get to those last few bites and pull it off.

Why?

I've come to the conclusion that it's just the crust you've grown up eating.  Some people, like myself, had a great experience with pie crust and look forward to every last one (even when we're disappointed by it).  Some people have had the worst, freezer burnt, nastiest, flavorless crusts in the known universe and refuse to give a homemade delicacy a try, no matter how good it smells.

Well, fear not.  This recipe is Sasha tested, Russ approved.  Even Mikey likes it!  (Actually, Mike hasn't tried it yet, but I'm sure he would)  Everything from the humble pie scrap bite to glorious pies and quiches will be better with a homemade crust!

Ingredients:
3 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1 tsp sugar
1 tsp salt (leave out if you're using salted butter)
2 sticks of COLD* unsalted butter (see above if you use salted)
1 glass of water with ice cubes in it

Directions:
Stir together your dry ingredients thoroughly.  Set butter on top and set water glass nearby.

The middle item is a pastry cutter: our friend in this exercise.  I know I don't usually condone special items, but it'll make your job much MUCH easier here.

Cut the butter into the flour mixture (if using the pastry cutter, press down into the butter and through into the flour repeatedly.  If using a fork, same, but more difficult) repeatedly until largest piece of butter is about the size of a pea.

Now add cold water, one tablespoon at a time, cutting in (make sure you are pressing all the way to the bottom of the bowl and rotating so you get all the flour mixed in)  After about 6 tablespoons (sometimes less), you should get some pieces that look like

sticking together as they press through the pastry cutter.  They'll hold their shape when you pick them up and eat them.  I mean, test them.  Sift your finger through the bowl at this point to see if there are any dry spots: if there are, add another tablespoon.  If not, you're done with this part.

Squish together all the dough with your (clean) hands.  Depending on your project, divide into two balls for two 9 inch pie crusts (or a top and a bottom of one) or leave it in one large ball for pie "scraps" or rugalach.  Wrap in plastic wrap and put in the fridge for at least an hour or up to a week.  Roll out on a floured surface when you're ready to use!


*Warm butter won't leave the flecks that make a crust good and flaky.  Yes, I know it's a pain to work with, but I promise you, it is worth it.

Panko Pork Schnitzel with Dill Cream Sauce

Super crispy-crunchy pork with a thick, creamy dill sauce.  What's not to love?

Ingredients:
1 lb pork tenderloin, cut into four chunks
1/2 cup flour
1/2 tsp pepper (fresh ground if possible)
2 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1 1/2 cups panko bread crumbs
2 tablespoons vegetable oil (you can use olive oil, but it may result in an odd flavor)
Sauce (note: I recommend pre-measuring all these ingredients)
1 cup chicken broth
1/2 cup chicken broth
2 tablespoon flour
2 tablespoons dried dill weed
1 cup sour cream

Directions
Lay the pork chunks between two pieces of wax paper and pound them flat (about 1/2 an inch thick) with either a meat mallet or a heavy can (crushed tomatoes work well).  Set aside.

In a medium bowl, combine flour and pepper.  In another bowl, beat eggs and milk.  Lay out panko on a large plate.

Coat pork in flour, then dip in eggs, and then coat in panko.  Repeat until all tenderloins are done.  Make sure the panko isn't moist: you should have enough on there that the top layer is dry.

Heat oil in a large skillet over medium high.  Wait until the pan is hot before adding in the pork (add the pork too soon and the panko will suck up the oil.  Not totally undesirable, but greasier than I like)  Cook about five minutes on each side, or until the breading is golden brown.  Pull out and set on a clean plate.

Reduce heat to medium and add in 1 cup chicken broth, stirring the mix to get up any crumbly bits up in the mix.  Gravy, baby.  In a small bowl, mix the 2 tablespoons flour with the remaining 1/2 cup chicken broth until all the lumps are gone, then add to the pan.  Cook until the mixture is browned and thickened to about the consistency of gravy.  Add in dill and sour cream and cook until warmed.

Serve pork and add sauce just before serving to retain maximum crunchiness!

Fudgy Chocolatey Brownies

I love brownies, but I'm very picky about them.  I don't like them hard, or cakey, or the ones that just barely taste like chocolate.  I like a dense, fudgey, moist, rich, chocolatey brownie that makes your mouth water just to think about it.  I like one that, fresh out of the oven, is like solidified fudge sauce under your vanilla icecream.

This is that brownie.

Ingredients:
4 oz bittersweet chocolate (I use Ghiradelli)*, snapped into small pieces.
1/2 cup (1 stick) of butter
1 cup sugar
1 tsp vanilla, NOT IMITATION
2 eggs
3/4 cup flour


Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 and thoroughly grease a 8x8 brownie pan.  I tend to use glass, but this is up to you.

Place stick of butter in a microwave safe bowl and heat for about 1 minute, or until totally melted.  Throw in the chocolate and stir until totally melted.  If you can't get it all melted, microwave another 30 seconds and stir again.

In a medium mixing bowl, put in sugar, vanilla, and eggs.  Pour butter/chocolate mix over top.  Mix thoroughly, scraping the bottom to get any sugar that might be stuck there.  Add flour and mix until combined.

Pour into brownie pan and spread out evenly.  Bake 30 minutes and let cool.

Eat.

Moan a bit.

*If you can't find bittersweet chocolate, don't worry.  Dark chocolate (usually sold by Hershey) or baking chocolate make acceptable substitutes.

Breakfast cups (Toast, egg, and bacon)

It is EXTREMELY rare that I sit down to breakfast at all, and even rarer that I make something fancy.  Yesterday, however, I was inspired by a picture I'd spotted in a magazine and feeling the need to spoil myself.

Ingredients:
6 pieces of bread, preferably soft (I used Sunbeam)
3 pieces of bacon, cut in half
4 eggs, beaten well
Butter, melted (2 tablespoons should do it)

Directions

Preheat oven to 375.

Thoroughly grease a muffin tin with butter.  I do mean thoroughly.  If you even doubt you have enough butter, add more.
 
Cut into bread from corners to allow it to fit down into the pan easier as the (horrible) diagram below shows, and push it down into the pan, folding up the edges.  If the bottom tears, don't worry too much.  That's what the butter was for.  You listened to me about the butter, right?

Cook your bacon until it is done, but still pliable (no crispy bacon here!).  Shake the grease off (or not) and curl it inside your bread in a little circle.

Make sure the eggs are beaten well and pour SLOWLY into the bread.  If you pour fast, it may come out in a glob and overflow.  Also, make sure not to overfill too much since it rises a bit and may come out of the pan.

Bake 20-25 minutes or until a tilted pan doesn't show any movement on top of the eggs.  If you have buttered your pan properly, they should just pop right out.  Enjoy hot or at room temperature!

Pasta and Garlic Spiced Shrimp

For those who have a taste for shrimp and want to stretch it further, this is a great recipe.  Make as spicy (or not) as you like!

Ingredients:
One pound of uncooked shrimp, de-veined, de-tailed, and cut in half hotdog style
Roughly 2 tbsp olive oil
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp red pepper flakes, or to taste
1 cup of white wine, whatever you have left in your fridge
1 package of fettucine or linguine pasta
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese, grated

Directions
Start cooking your pasta before you do anything else.  Boil a whole box for about 10 minutes.

While that's cooking, heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium high with the garlic and the red pepper flakes.  Add in the shrimp when the oil starts to "spit" and stir it until it curls up and turns pink.  Add in white wine.

When pasta has finished its ten minutes, drain thoroughly and add to the skillet, stirring slightly to coat the pasta with the liquid.  Simmer another five minutes or so, then sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and mix in until the Parmesan disappears into the sauce.

Goldrush Bars

I have Holly to thank for this recipe.  I tweaked it a little to get a bit more stability and increase the Oreo to filling ratio because I like it that way.

Ingredients:
1 pkg Golden Oreo Cookies (I don't really recommend double stuffed)
1/4 stick of butter, softened
1/2 a block of cream cheese, softened
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 3/4 cup of milk
1 small box of cheesecake flavored instant pudding

Directions:
 Step one is to crush your Oreos.  There are two basic ways to do this: the first is to stick them in a blender and the second is to put them in a ziploc and beat them into bits.  I enjoy the second.

In a small bowl, mash together your butter and cream cheese with the back of a spoon.  Add the powdered sugar and squish together until it's all mixed.

In a larger bowl, whisk milk and pudding mix until the pudding starts to get firm.  Add in the cream cheese mix and whisk out the lumps.

In a 9x9 (or 8x8) brownie pan, cover the bottom with Oreo crumbs.  Cover with all of the filling and spread around so everything is covered.  Sprinkle the top with more Oreo crumbs, as much as you want.

Chill until firm (at least 2 hours)